Doggie Lover Doll, A Sex Toy for Dogs — Is this Necessary?

October 31, 2009

The answer to the question posed in the title is obviously (repeat after me) No, a sex toy is not necessary for your un-neutered male dog.*


As Thorstein Veblen explained almost a century ago everything above survival level is abundance. He coined the phrase “conspicuous consumption” to describe the resources we spend/waste on showing how far above survival level our income is. Merely owning and maintaining a dog, in the strictest sense, sends the message that you have enough resources that you can support a non-essential animal. Click image for larger size.

In 2007 Business Week reported that Americans spent $41 billion on pets and pet care. Clearly, with a market this large there will be excesses. In 2007 the object of some (deserved) media derision was the product Neuticles, artifical testicles implanted in male dogs after neutering ” to let people restore their pets to anatomical preciseness” according to inventor Gregg A. Miller.

Now from Miami, Florida and São Paulo, Brazil comes the DoggieLoverDoll. Here’s the essential pitch from PetSmiling company’s web site. Their product is

A female canine manufactured in soft rubber with a silicone vagina and an easy to clean reservoir. The product also comes with a tube of water-based intimate lubricant, to increase the useful life of the doll.

This doll comes in three sizes: small, medium and large, to satisfy all existing races. “I had the idea to make this doll when my Maltese started to grab everybody’s legs. I did some research and couldn’t find anything like it, anywhere in the world. I decided to make it!”, reveals Marco Giroto, owner of the PetSmiling company, responsible for this worldwide novelty.

When a dog tries to hump legs, stuffed animals and other objects, he cannot reach an ejaculation. With the DoggieLoverDoll he can. Human beings have their hands to masturbate themselves, now the domestic animals, which have practically no contact with females in heat, can alleviate themselves with a toy designed specifically for them. Dogs have a great sexual appetite and this novelty, surely will better their lives.

If anyone determines that this is a well-executed hoax I would greatly appreciate your letting us all in on the gag.

doggieloverdoll_3_viewsThe tiny footprint of the parent site is just one reason my Spidey-sense is whispering Fake! in my ear. There doesn’t seem to be any retailer I can find on the web offering it for sale. And you can’t purchase it from the PetSmiling web site; there’s no order form, just an email contact. Curiouser and curiouser. If anyone spots this item for sale anywhere, please post a comment with details (and links). Click image for larger size.


*And, if you are not a dog breeder and your dog is a companion, not a working dog, you should seriously consider spaying your female dog and neutering your male dog. There are numerous benefits and the biggest hurdle (usually) is over-coming the projected anxiety of male humans who own dogs.

Get over it.

Help reduce the dog population explosion we’ve had for the past century: too many good dogs chasing after too few good homes.


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